Sh*t your pants at 20

Yeah you read that right.

I’m talking about those dreaded years… your 20’s. I was talking to my bestie this morning and it really just hit me how weird these years of your life are. Right now I don’t really have a  guide for you as such and this should explain why:

I remember being like 5 and thinking “OMG I can’t wait till I can walk to the shops on my own that will be so exciting” then as soon as I was allowed to go alone, I realised, this luxury also meant I was now able to shop for my whole family and spent my weekends running up to Budgens because we had run out of milk… suddenly I wished I wasn’t allowed to anymore.

Then you are so excited to drive, go to work, live alone and be an adult but no one can prepare you for your 20’s.

I don’t know about you but I may be 22 but I often feel about 15 (and look it)

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Here are some of the adult things I have achieved:

  • Bought a car
  • Bought a flat
  • Worked full time for around 5 years
  • Bought my own pet (yeah my own pet that I have to keep alive – scary stuff)
  • Been with my boyfriend for nearly 7 years
  • Read a book because I want to not because I have to

I’m going to be totally honest with you and buying a flat is one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. I feel it deserves its own post to be honest as it is something I am very passionate about.

So these are all things I was super excited about as a naive child and now I’m here I’ve never felt so confused and here is why:

  • Yeah I bought a flat and a car but what does that mean? Responsibility 
  • I have a career but I also have a flat and a car so what does that mean? Pressure 
  • I bought a lizard who is super cute but what does that mean? Worrying
  • I’ve been with my boyfriend for nearly 7 years so what does that mean? Soz got nothing for you HA. That’s one of the best things.

Pressure and responsibility are probably two of the biggest learning curves… I want to do well and make my family proud, I want to be successful but I want that now, which adds to personal pressure.

When it all gets too much all I want is my mum to be totally truthful…

If you feel like this don’t worry, we all do. Life is super confusing and we are all just trying to muddle by and figure out what the right decisions are…

Cat x

 

 

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